The 12-year-old student got the teacher pregnant
boys walking through the halls before
our protagonist and soon-to-be school
hero donnie berger announces he got
tickets to the van halen concert zam you
shouldn't buy one of the girls nah i'm
not into girls anymore i'm into guys too
hmm well actually what he really meant
is that he's into women now okay
suddenly his friend decides he really
wants to show us his lunchbox very cool
then donnie decides to make his move on
his teacher hey you want to come to this
concert with me he proposes that they
could be good pals and she could play
rock paper scissors with him that is a
month's detention at detention donnie
faces the unimaginable punishment of
being alone in a room with his hot
teacher then like something out of a
fantasy she begins to flirt with him you
like me don't you i don't know what i'm
supposed to say right now i've been
watching you a long time like when you
scored that game-winning touchdown you
were sweating like a jar of pickles in
the hot sun huh okay is this really
happening yep and whatever this is
donnie's buddy gets a front row seat to
it nice we proceed with a wholesome
montage of a teacher and student bonding
together over the many lessons life can
give us one day at a school assembly a
sussy eruption can be heard hmm carry on
so anyway school is like really lame
oh seems like someone is having an
impromptu piano session in the back the
principal signals for the curtains to be
dropped and well it's donnie and his
piano skills are amazing let's go we did
it even the teachers can't help but
celebrate donnie's performance fast
forward a bit and we're in a courtroom
the case has garnered mass attention and
at the trial we see that miss mcgarricle
has plumped up for the winter the judge
who i'm pretty sure is ursula cross with
a bulldog notes that miss mcgarrickle
shows no remorse for her actions going
as far as to state that he makes me feel
like there's a rainbow coming out of my
beaver okay due to the severity of her
crimes she's sentenced to 30 years in
prison the custody over her future baby
will go to donny's dad
until danny is 18 then he'll get it in
the aftermath donnie star source high
and bright he's on magazines tv shows
and even becomes a movie star ironic
fast forward many many years later and
he's broke and old but still has the iq
of a child he just learned from his
lawyer that he owes 43 thousand dollars
in taxes i don't got that kind of money
don't screw up my tom brady poster man
look at that jawline did i write this
movie anyway his lawyer has an idea you
know there's this marathon going on with
this fat guy fat guy who has 8 000 to 1
odds i really think he can win it
alright put me in for twenty then seeing
as donnie has no other financial
prospects the lawyer inquires about his
son han solo you named your son han solo
burger yeah sir han solo burger coolest
name in the world right oh he's a junker
sadly his son wants nothing to do with
him well can't you just facebook him i
can't afford that [ __ ] actually that's
not how that anyway meet donnie son han
solo who now goes by the name todd
peterson he's getting married but is
weary of his face being plastered on a
magazine about the wedding i just don't
want anyone to find me calm down babe
did you bring your security undies with
you yes of course yeah i i don't know
what that's about we cut to todd and his
fiancee jamie pulling up to his boss's
summer house where the wedding will be
held the boss man steve shares that he
himself was married a whole three times
to a bunch of cheaters
inside we meet jaime's brother chad
uh-oh that's quite the strong hug todd
salutes the soldier but invites his
wrath after chad realizes he's not a
soldier he's not even a girl scout you
put that hand down you civilian oh and
by the way if you ever hurt my sister i
will hurt you meanwhile donnie kicks
back at a club before being handed you
guessed it the magazine with his son on
it afterwards in an effort to get some
cash donnie heads to his old agency to
try to book a gig though the
receptionist claims the boss man mr
morgan is on vacation while there he
runs into his old buddy vanilla ice but
he gives him the cold shoulder
why are you being like that man we were
friends for 20 years yeah until you did
my mom
whoa now boys no one trashes my studio
unless i got some cameras rolling okay
so you weren't on vacation donnie gets
to chatting about some potential
opportunities completely disregarding
the fact that he's yesterday's news but
then mr morgan inquires about donnie's
son he must be a total nutcase right no
he's doing good lost a lot of weight and
he's a hedge fund manager hmm everybody
loves a happy ending this could be great
for ratings mr morgan agrees to fork up
himself and his son at the women's
prison for a good old family reunion
back at the house everyone gets to
chatting except for steve's mom she's
sleeping i hope i mean that this time
suddenly
my goodness somehow donnie's tracked
down his son over the delightful guest
he leaves jaime with a present
interesting yeah
then he storms in oh todd your old man
is here
oh thank god granny is fine todd what
are you doing sorry
anyway todd can hardly keep himself
together at this sudden turn of events i
thought you said your parents are dead
uh yeah this is my old man friend they
proceed with introductions and then we
get to chat hey oh oh god no after pause
that feels like forever
what donnie goes on to share that him
and todd are in fact best friends with
the most unbelievable story on how they
met you see todd was by these train
tracks and he had a burrito and dropped
it and he hopped down and i was like oh
my god this guy's gonna die so i lay
down on the tracks tense up my muscles
and the whole train just whooshed right
over me saving todd why wouldn't you
just get another burrito todd hmm that
is a fair point the family absolutely
adores donnie and begs him to stay to
which todd reluctantly has no choice but
to accept later the pair chat while
donnie unpacks his garbage bag your mom
is sick you gotta come visit her the two
argue about donnie's lackluster
parenting skills and how todd got
diabetes cause of it you let me eat
donuts for breakfast every day man but
that's what you can ask for but it's not
what i needed their arguing is cut short
by the party that's starting soon at the
party todd chats with his boss before
donnie erupts some stupid line adam
sandler wrote that i don't quite
remember at this very moment who the
heck is that guy jamie signals donnie to
come over and
hmm
is that back because i've been dying for
that to come back
what's up
what's up
all right that was pretty funny feeling
inspired todd gives it a shot what's up
yeah that wasn't great todd afterwards
we cut to todd's best man phil who
decides to step down seeing as todd's
true best man donny popped up out of
nowhere turns out phil and him weren't
even that close that's true he had no
idea who he was yeah that's kind of sad
donnie pulls up to the mic but very
quickly spots a fabulous baseball course
on the property hey why don't we blow
this popsicle stand and play some ball
batter up and the first ball goes to
grandma very nice on the other hand as a
physically incapable beta male todd is
very nervous about receiving the ball
come on man even the two-year-old can do
it okay let's get this out of the way
he's fine guys he's normal moving on at
night donnie overhears todd in the
shower while he argues with jaime he
walks in his tod steps out you shower in
your bathing suit indeed he does and he
blames his insecurities on his father i
can't even take my shirt off around
people why well because his dad gave him
a ginormous back tattoo when he was 13.
he's grown quite a bit since then hence
the warped heads however donnie assures
him it's perfectly normal the same thing
happened to him with his tattoo oh
that's reassuring then in an effort to
get his son to cheer up donnie starts to
tickle him soon things escalate into a
full-on wrestling match which chad steps
in on oh you boys are wrastlin i happen
to be a state champion let's go chad
psyches himself up and goes straight for
the kill things are looking dicey for
todd until
his pops comes in clutch we cut to todd
getting ready for bed when his
bride-to-be pulls up donning her dress
wait no that's bad luck for our marriage
you're right i've seen the end of this
movie already their conversations ways
towards donnie and jaime remarks that
it's no surprise his son ran off wait
what exactly has donnie been going
around saying he's been handing out his
book just read the first page head in
the class nice todd flips the first page
to reveal a plea to him to reach out he
can't help but get emotional can i get a
hug right now no no no damn his wife
doesn't even let him hug her to be fair
she is wearing that very expensive dress
well how about you take it off no it's
like down todd she's treating you like a
damn dog man the next morning donnie
basically mirrors that statement
criticizing his son for being a little
baby wimpy boy right after the family
heads the church to do church wedding
stuff very cool they're supposed to
start with the groom's father but todd
shares that his father died in an
explosion i'm sorry to hear that that's
okay he deserved it this hits a nerve
with father mcnelly who himself had an
especially abusive father you don't see
me complaining boy feeling inspired by
his dad's earlier words todd decides to
stand up for himself for a change all i
can focus on is your
breath
seems father mcnelly took that well as
instead of getting angry he invites todd
to the garden
oh he's pretty ripped for an old guy the
two commence with battle with the holy
man taking the lead but then
todd hits him with the hell of a shot
though this only empowers father mcnelly
who now seems to be possessed by a demon
ironic todd assumes his battle stance
and then
oh nice naturally everyone is upset at
todd but donnie diffuses the tension by
reminding everyone about the traumatic
experience todd went through the last
time he was at a church during his dad's
funeral who might i remind you
supposedly exploded and it was an open
casket funeral yep todd ended up
watching a squirrel run off with the
little that remained of his totally
deceased father tiny piece of skin
flapping in its mouth tragic okay it
seems like everyone likes todd again but
there's still the issue of who's gonna
marry them now that father mcnelly is
angry maybe we could have a black pastor
it's very urban very street okay
they got their new man and a new
location now it's time for the bachelor
party a party that phil has expertly
planned as a knight they'll never forget
they arrive at the location spa for men
oh heck yeah however as the lady drones
on and on it dawns on donnie that this
is just your everyday run-of-the-mill
spa nonetheless donnie totally very
happily goes along with the relaxing
night until he makes a scene come on
guys this is heck and lame this is not
how you party suddenly the lady from
earlier storms in and spews a tornado of
insoles at donny before admitting she
finds it irresistible so i'm gonna go
put a dent in that take notes boys after
he wraps up all the gentlemen head to a
club they enjoy the night todd meets a
girl the noses han solo and they dance
their troubles away
sorta once everyone's all tuckered out
donnie sends them home except for his
son whom he chooses to spend some
quality time with he bestows upon todd
and earring his mother gave donnie
wishing to hand it down as a sort of
family tradition alright let's get that
bad boy pierced
looks great continuing their night of
mayhem the pair decide to hit up old
uncle vinnie whoa it's vanilla ice was
uncle vadie vanilla ice this whole time
donnie apologizes about vanilla's mom
and they make peace before heading out
on the town they get up to no good in a
nice rink piss off a convenience store
clerk
and strike out at a bowling alley oh hey
the clerk followed along as the night
slows down donnie decides to finally
teach his boy how to ride a bike todd
clutches his security undies as he feels
scared why do you have those because you
never picked me up at school once and i
got scared and i [ __ ] my pants oh well
you don't need those anymore son i'll
never leave you and so todd tosses them
away and rides off on his own with no
training wheels
uh-oh at last the night concludes which
vanilla objects to before taking a long
nap before entering the house donnie
exclaims his love for todd aka hanzi i
want you to call me dad every once in a
while uh i'm not quite ready to do that
yet donnie then the pair share a
heartfelt hug before todd decides that
yes he will visit his mom in prison
realizing the camera cruise will be
there donnie tries to convince him
otherwise as he now values his son more
than staying out of jail respect the
next morning todd is awakened by a
horrifying scream
his wife has stumbled upon her wedding
dress covered in puke yeah that was todd
suddenly
donnie barges in believing this screams
to be the result of an intruder no we're
fine sort of who wants a piece of paper
vanilla chill man we're good cutting to
a bit later donnie made everyone
breakfast while todd took care of the
dress he rings up his pops and lets him
know he's on his way to visit mom oh
crap donnie rushes to his car and speeds
over to stop him try as he might it's
too late miss mcgargle walks over
striding her stuff along the way ah the
memories fun fact she's the mom of the
younger version in real life anyway they
briefly catch up before wait a minute is
that a microphone donnie initially
feigns ignorance but mr morgan spills
the truth i offered your dad 50 grand to
set this up an enraged todd storms off
before getting physical with donnie
and as a result well let's just say you
shouldn't have thrown away that extra
pair of undies i hate you
dad oh he called him dad after donnie
heads back to get his things and depart
from todd's life once more that is until
he overhears todd's fiance speaking to
another man steve on the phone i don't
care if he finds out uh-oh the next day
donnie crashes a party the day before
the wedding todd you can't marry her
she's cheating with steve steve is
todd's boss oh my god or maybe she's not
turns out she was on the phone with
another steve who's actually a wedding
reporter who wants to do a piece on them
it was supposed to be a surprise at
night todd prepares to take his wife
home but then chad pulls up meanwhile a
depressed donnie reasons that to win
todd over he'll have to first win over
jaime and what better way than with some
ice cream true he heads into the hotel
she's staying at and upon nearing her
room here's some very saucy sounds
fearing for the sanctity of his son's
marriage donnie sneaks around the
outside of the building to do some
snooping oh my god steve come out now
is this for real right now chad explains
that this is simply their secret tickle
time secret tickle time donnie has seen
enough he heads out to break the news to
todd but jamie stops him how much do i
have to pay you seeing as todd never
signed the release form for the prison
tv thing donnie is still broke and on
the brink of going to jail so he takes
the money and stays quiet the next day
he chats with his lawyer about what
happened we've all been there oh oh okay
he congratulates him but donnie just
can't let it end like this he rushes to
vanilla ice's place hops in the car with
him throws on some tunes and rushes to
the wedding meanwhile the ceremony is
underway they're running out of time oh
great now they're stuck the pair run the
rest of the way and make it just in the
nick of time we ran well over a mile me
when i run well over a mile
before donnie can spill the beans
jamie's dad runs after him but grandma
comes in
talk clutch gives jamie a choice tell
todd or i tell everyone after a moment
she leans into his ear okay well that's
not that bad man you are lying this is
your last chance jimmy trepidatiously
leans in once more you do secret tickle
time with your
brother with that the marriage is off
and he reveals his true identity my name
isn't todd peterson it's han solo and i
am a burger god bless suddenly jaime
charges towards donny with a knife in
hand
nice save he hands the drink to hans but
then chad comes in full speed ahead
like father like son in the aftermath
all the boys celebrate and we see that
todd has already moved on to bree and as
far as donny's debts well check out the
tv looks like the big boy actually did
it against all odds donnie's 20 bet is
now worth 160 thousand hurrah moral of
the story i have no idea happy holidays
okay i'm going to sleep now good night
you
boys walking through the halls before
our protagonist and soon-to-be school
hero donnie berger announces he got
tickets to the van halen concert zam you
shouldn't buy one of the girls nah i'm
not into girls anymore i'm into guys too
hmm well actually what he really meant
is that he's into women now okay
suddenly his friend decides he really
wants to show us his lunchbox very cool
then donnie decides to make his move on
his teacher hey you want to come to this
concert with me he proposes that they
could be good pals and she could play
rock paper scissors with him that is a
month's detention at detention donnie
faces the unimaginable punishment of
being alone in a room with his hot
teacher then like something out of a
fantasy she begins to flirt with him you
like me don't you i don't know what i'm
supposed to say right now i've been
watching you a long time like when you
scored that game-winning touchdown you
were sweating like a jar of pickles in
the hot sun huh okay is this really
happening yep and whatever this is
donnie's buddy gets a front row seat to
it nice we proceed with a wholesome
montage of a teacher and student bonding
together over the many lessons life can
give us one day at a school assembly a
sussy eruption can be heard hmm carry on
so anyway school is like really lame
oh seems like someone is having an
impromptu piano session in the back the
principal signals for the curtains to be
dropped and well it's donnie and his
piano skills are amazing let's go we did
it even the teachers can't help but
celebrate donnie's performance fast
forward a bit and we're in a courtroom
the case has garnered mass attention and
at the trial we see that miss mcgarricle
has plumped up for the winter the judge
who i'm pretty sure is ursula cross with
a bulldog notes that miss mcgarrickle
shows no remorse for her actions going
as far as to state that he makes me feel
like there's a rainbow coming out of my
beaver okay due to the severity of her
crimes she's sentenced to 30 years in
prison the custody over her future baby
will go to donny's dad
until danny is 18 then he'll get it in
the aftermath donnie star source high
and bright he's on magazines tv shows
and even becomes a movie star ironic
fast forward many many years later and
he's broke and old but still has the iq
of a child he just learned from his
lawyer that he owes 43 thousand dollars
in taxes i don't got that kind of money
don't screw up my tom brady poster man
look at that jawline did i write this
movie anyway his lawyer has an idea you
know there's this marathon going on with
this fat guy fat guy who has 8 000 to 1
odds i really think he can win it
alright put me in for twenty then seeing
as donnie has no other financial
prospects the lawyer inquires about his
son han solo you named your son han solo
burger yeah sir han solo burger coolest
name in the world right oh he's a junker
sadly his son wants nothing to do with
him well can't you just facebook him i
can't afford that [ __ ] actually that's
not how that anyway meet donnie son han
solo who now goes by the name todd
peterson he's getting married but is
weary of his face being plastered on a
magazine about the wedding i just don't
want anyone to find me calm down babe
did you bring your security undies with
you yes of course yeah i i don't know
what that's about we cut to todd and his
fiancee jamie pulling up to his boss's
summer house where the wedding will be
held the boss man steve shares that he
himself was married a whole three times
to a bunch of cheaters
inside we meet jaime's brother chad
uh-oh that's quite the strong hug todd
salutes the soldier but invites his
wrath after chad realizes he's not a
soldier he's not even a girl scout you
put that hand down you civilian oh and
by the way if you ever hurt my sister i
will hurt you meanwhile donnie kicks
back at a club before being handed you
guessed it the magazine with his son on
it afterwards in an effort to get some
cash donnie heads to his old agency to
try to book a gig though the
receptionist claims the boss man mr
morgan is on vacation while there he
runs into his old buddy vanilla ice but
he gives him the cold shoulder
why are you being like that man we were
friends for 20 years yeah until you did
my mom
whoa now boys no one trashes my studio
unless i got some cameras rolling okay
so you weren't on vacation donnie gets
to chatting about some potential
opportunities completely disregarding
the fact that he's yesterday's news but
then mr morgan inquires about donnie's
son he must be a total nutcase right no
he's doing good lost a lot of weight and
he's a hedge fund manager hmm everybody
loves a happy ending this could be great
for ratings mr morgan agrees to fork up
himself and his son at the women's
prison for a good old family reunion
back at the house everyone gets to
chatting except for steve's mom she's
sleeping i hope i mean that this time
suddenly
my goodness somehow donnie's tracked
down his son over the delightful guest
he leaves jaime with a present
interesting yeah
then he storms in oh todd your old man
is here
oh thank god granny is fine todd what
are you doing sorry
anyway todd can hardly keep himself
together at this sudden turn of events i
thought you said your parents are dead
uh yeah this is my old man friend they
proceed with introductions and then we
get to chat hey oh oh god no after pause
that feels like forever
what donnie goes on to share that him
and todd are in fact best friends with
the most unbelievable story on how they
met you see todd was by these train
tracks and he had a burrito and dropped
it and he hopped down and i was like oh
my god this guy's gonna die so i lay
down on the tracks tense up my muscles
and the whole train just whooshed right
over me saving todd why wouldn't you
just get another burrito todd hmm that
is a fair point the family absolutely
adores donnie and begs him to stay to
which todd reluctantly has no choice but
to accept later the pair chat while
donnie unpacks his garbage bag your mom
is sick you gotta come visit her the two
argue about donnie's lackluster
parenting skills and how todd got
diabetes cause of it you let me eat
donuts for breakfast every day man but
that's what you can ask for but it's not
what i needed their arguing is cut short
by the party that's starting soon at the
party todd chats with his boss before
donnie erupts some stupid line adam
sandler wrote that i don't quite
remember at this very moment who the
heck is that guy jamie signals donnie to
come over and
hmm
is that back because i've been dying for
that to come back
what's up
what's up
all right that was pretty funny feeling
inspired todd gives it a shot what's up
yeah that wasn't great todd afterwards
we cut to todd's best man phil who
decides to step down seeing as todd's
true best man donny popped up out of
nowhere turns out phil and him weren't
even that close that's true he had no
idea who he was yeah that's kind of sad
donnie pulls up to the mic but very
quickly spots a fabulous baseball course
on the property hey why don't we blow
this popsicle stand and play some ball
batter up and the first ball goes to
grandma very nice on the other hand as a
physically incapable beta male todd is
very nervous about receiving the ball
come on man even the two-year-old can do
it okay let's get this out of the way
he's fine guys he's normal moving on at
night donnie overhears todd in the
shower while he argues with jaime he
walks in his tod steps out you shower in
your bathing suit indeed he does and he
blames his insecurities on his father i
can't even take my shirt off around
people why well because his dad gave him
a ginormous back tattoo when he was 13.
he's grown quite a bit since then hence
the warped heads however donnie assures
him it's perfectly normal the same thing
happened to him with his tattoo oh
that's reassuring then in an effort to
get his son to cheer up donnie starts to
tickle him soon things escalate into a
full-on wrestling match which chad steps
in on oh you boys are wrastlin i happen
to be a state champion let's go chad
psyches himself up and goes straight for
the kill things are looking dicey for
todd until
his pops comes in clutch we cut to todd
getting ready for bed when his
bride-to-be pulls up donning her dress
wait no that's bad luck for our marriage
you're right i've seen the end of this
movie already their conversations ways
towards donnie and jaime remarks that
it's no surprise his son ran off wait
what exactly has donnie been going
around saying he's been handing out his
book just read the first page head in
the class nice todd flips the first page
to reveal a plea to him to reach out he
can't help but get emotional can i get a
hug right now no no no damn his wife
doesn't even let him hug her to be fair
she is wearing that very expensive dress
well how about you take it off no it's
like down todd she's treating you like a
damn dog man the next morning donnie
basically mirrors that statement
criticizing his son for being a little
baby wimpy boy right after the family
heads the church to do church wedding
stuff very cool they're supposed to
start with the groom's father but todd
shares that his father died in an
explosion i'm sorry to hear that that's
okay he deserved it this hits a nerve
with father mcnelly who himself had an
especially abusive father you don't see
me complaining boy feeling inspired by
his dad's earlier words todd decides to
stand up for himself for a change all i
can focus on is your
breath
seems father mcnelly took that well as
instead of getting angry he invites todd
to the garden
oh he's pretty ripped for an old guy the
two commence with battle with the holy
man taking the lead but then
todd hits him with the hell of a shot
though this only empowers father mcnelly
who now seems to be possessed by a demon
ironic todd assumes his battle stance
and then
oh nice naturally everyone is upset at
todd but donnie diffuses the tension by
reminding everyone about the traumatic
experience todd went through the last
time he was at a church during his dad's
funeral who might i remind you
supposedly exploded and it was an open
casket funeral yep todd ended up
watching a squirrel run off with the
little that remained of his totally
deceased father tiny piece of skin
flapping in its mouth tragic okay it
seems like everyone likes todd again but
there's still the issue of who's gonna
marry them now that father mcnelly is
angry maybe we could have a black pastor
it's very urban very street okay
they got their new man and a new
location now it's time for the bachelor
party a party that phil has expertly
planned as a knight they'll never forget
they arrive at the location spa for men
oh heck yeah however as the lady drones
on and on it dawns on donnie that this
is just your everyday run-of-the-mill
spa nonetheless donnie totally very
happily goes along with the relaxing
night until he makes a scene come on
guys this is heck and lame this is not
how you party suddenly the lady from
earlier storms in and spews a tornado of
insoles at donny before admitting she
finds it irresistible so i'm gonna go
put a dent in that take notes boys after
he wraps up all the gentlemen head to a
club they enjoy the night todd meets a
girl the noses han solo and they dance
their troubles away
sorta once everyone's all tuckered out
donnie sends them home except for his
son whom he chooses to spend some
quality time with he bestows upon todd
and earring his mother gave donnie
wishing to hand it down as a sort of
family tradition alright let's get that
bad boy pierced
looks great continuing their night of
mayhem the pair decide to hit up old
uncle vinnie whoa it's vanilla ice was
uncle vadie vanilla ice this whole time
donnie apologizes about vanilla's mom
and they make peace before heading out
on the town they get up to no good in a
nice rink piss off a convenience store
clerk
and strike out at a bowling alley oh hey
the clerk followed along as the night
slows down donnie decides to finally
teach his boy how to ride a bike todd
clutches his security undies as he feels
scared why do you have those because you
never picked me up at school once and i
got scared and i [ __ ] my pants oh well
you don't need those anymore son i'll
never leave you and so todd tosses them
away and rides off on his own with no
training wheels
uh-oh at last the night concludes which
vanilla objects to before taking a long
nap before entering the house donnie
exclaims his love for todd aka hanzi i
want you to call me dad every once in a
while uh i'm not quite ready to do that
yet donnie then the pair share a
heartfelt hug before todd decides that
yes he will visit his mom in prison
realizing the camera cruise will be
there donnie tries to convince him
otherwise as he now values his son more
than staying out of jail respect the
next morning todd is awakened by a
horrifying scream
his wife has stumbled upon her wedding
dress covered in puke yeah that was todd
suddenly
donnie barges in believing this screams
to be the result of an intruder no we're
fine sort of who wants a piece of paper
vanilla chill man we're good cutting to
a bit later donnie made everyone
breakfast while todd took care of the
dress he rings up his pops and lets him
know he's on his way to visit mom oh
crap donnie rushes to his car and speeds
over to stop him try as he might it's
too late miss mcgargle walks over
striding her stuff along the way ah the
memories fun fact she's the mom of the
younger version in real life anyway they
briefly catch up before wait a minute is
that a microphone donnie initially
feigns ignorance but mr morgan spills
the truth i offered your dad 50 grand to
set this up an enraged todd storms off
before getting physical with donnie
and as a result well let's just say you
shouldn't have thrown away that extra
pair of undies i hate you
dad oh he called him dad after donnie
heads back to get his things and depart
from todd's life once more that is until
he overhears todd's fiance speaking to
another man steve on the phone i don't
care if he finds out uh-oh the next day
donnie crashes a party the day before
the wedding todd you can't marry her
she's cheating with steve steve is
todd's boss oh my god or maybe she's not
turns out she was on the phone with
another steve who's actually a wedding
reporter who wants to do a piece on them
it was supposed to be a surprise at
night todd prepares to take his wife
home but then chad pulls up meanwhile a
depressed donnie reasons that to win
todd over he'll have to first win over
jaime and what better way than with some
ice cream true he heads into the hotel
she's staying at and upon nearing her
room here's some very saucy sounds
fearing for the sanctity of his son's
marriage donnie sneaks around the
outside of the building to do some
snooping oh my god steve come out now
is this for real right now chad explains
that this is simply their secret tickle
time secret tickle time donnie has seen
enough he heads out to break the news to
todd but jamie stops him how much do i
have to pay you seeing as todd never
signed the release form for the prison
tv thing donnie is still broke and on
the brink of going to jail so he takes
the money and stays quiet the next day
he chats with his lawyer about what
happened we've all been there oh oh okay
he congratulates him but donnie just
can't let it end like this he rushes to
vanilla ice's place hops in the car with
him throws on some tunes and rushes to
the wedding meanwhile the ceremony is
underway they're running out of time oh
great now they're stuck the pair run the
rest of the way and make it just in the
nick of time we ran well over a mile me
when i run well over a mile
before donnie can spill the beans
jamie's dad runs after him but grandma
comes in
talk clutch gives jamie a choice tell
todd or i tell everyone after a moment
she leans into his ear okay well that's
not that bad man you are lying this is
your last chance jimmy trepidatiously
leans in once more you do secret tickle
time with your
brother with that the marriage is off
and he reveals his true identity my name
isn't todd peterson it's han solo and i
am a burger god bless suddenly jaime
charges towards donny with a knife in
hand
nice save he hands the drink to hans but
then chad comes in full speed ahead
like father like son in the aftermath
all the boys celebrate and we see that
todd has already moved on to bree and as
far as donny's debts well check out the
tv looks like the big boy actually did
it against all odds donnie's 20 bet is
now worth 160 thousand hurrah moral of
the story i have no idea happy holidays
okay i'm going to sleep now good night
you
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